im back and resetting my blog again
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next time a man hits me up, im hitting him
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legumes! legumes! legumes!
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*picks you up and flips you like a soju bottle*
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all i know how to do is get nervous diarrhea and like boys who don’t like me back
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If Trump goes to prison during pride month I will literally never stop laughing like to charge reblog to cast give me all of your evil thoughts and prayers for this freak to get his first ever consequence.
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having that crush was a mistake. next time i simply will not
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seances with the dead or, as I like to call em, taking the ol’ fishing rod out to the river styx
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i am…how do you say…experience torment not known to any mortal man
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if there’s one thing you should know about me it’s that i love to piss
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fuck it *stabs you with my hello kitty scissors*
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whisky would taste better if it tasted like the perfume my mom used to wear
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with the way the universe has been fucking me lately, i should get tested
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all hamsters were made in a lab
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